Bath Time
by Spyder1070
Summary: Not quite sure how to summarise this one. Except to say that the title really says it all. ONE SHOT.


2D is heading towards the bathroom, toiletries in hand, and ready to take a shower before he heads to the kitchen for breakfast. It occurs to him that he's actually sick of showers, and would like to take a bath for a change. Knowing Kong doesn't actually have a bath, he wonders if maybe he could go buy one, so he stops walking and quietly stands in the middle of the corridor, thinking about it. An hour later, Murdoc is walking down the corridor, when he spots 2D standing there quietly, just a few short steps from the bathroom door, still clutching his toiletries and lost in an obvious daze. Not able to resist, the old man stops just behind the keyboardist, and reaches back his hand, letting fly with a sharp slap square in the back of 2D's head, before continuing quickly on to the bathroom and darting inside. The young man snaps immediately out of his daze and looks rapidly round the room. Seeing no one about, he decides he must of fallen asleep and dreamed it, so with a sheepish shrug, he continues on his way.

Later that day, 2D is standing in the lobby anxiously waiting for something. Russel wanders by eating a cheese burger. He stops and watches the keyboardist standing there wringing his hands, and shifting his weight back and forth, from one foot to the other. Taking another bite of his burger and chewing slowly, the large drummer leans some of his weight on the lobby desk, waiting for the younger man to look up and notice him. But 2D doesn't appear to though, and continues staring nervously at the front door. Russel gives up and clears his throat loudly, popping the last of his burger in his mouth. 2D finally looks over at him and smiles faintly.

"Oh, allo Russ. Didn' see ya there." he remarks, before looking back at the door. Russel half smiles back and looks down at his fingers, inspecting them for leftover bits of burger.

"Eh. I hate tah ask, coz it usually results in some weird cracker shi', but... Wha'cha doin' man?" Russel asks, reaching into a paper bag he'd been carrying, and taking out another cheese burger. 2D looks back at Russel briefly, then turns back to the door.

"Nufink. Just waitin' for me bath." the keyboardist explains. Russel, who was about to take a bite of the retrieved cheese burger, stops. Mouth wide open, burger poised on the brink of being bitten down on, he stares blankly ahead, as the words trip slowly back and forth in the drummer's mind. But they don't seem to be coming any clearer, or making any more sense than they did, when they'd first arrived. So the large man slowly turns his vacant eyes to 2D, and lowers the burger. Just at that moment, Murdoc walks through the room and past them both. Having witnessed Russel lower the still not bitten into burger, he shakes his head.

"Who'd of thought it possible? That the Dullard would be the one, to make Russel put down the burger. Ha! I'm actually insulted." the bassist says as he continues walking by, before opening the door in front of him, and ducking into the car park corridor. Russel snarls menacingly at the closing car park door, before turning his attention back to 2D.

"Man, do yah even know wot it is yah jus' said?" Not waiting for an answer, he gives up and walks away, waving the whole situation off. "Crazy. Damn Murdoc. Swear it's like a twen'y fo' hour set up. I need a Coke." 2D barely seems to even notice the large man's exit, and begins nervously pacing back and forth, stopping occasionally to look at the door as he continues to wait.

Later that afternoon, 2D's bath has arrived and he's dragged it, by himself, further into the lobby after sending the delivery man away. He smiles at his new possession, and is about to open the box, when he realizes, he has no idea where to put it.

"Aww, no fair."

After sitting himself down on the top of the box, and having a nap for about three quarters of an hour, he wakes up and decides that he could put it in the back end. Smiling he jumps down from the box and continues pushing it in the direction of the car park. It takes him most of the night, and well into the next morning, but eventually, the keyboardist has made himself a nice clear space in the already over stuffed room, and installed the new bath Happy with the result, he wanders back out to get his toiletries from his bedroom, and test his new bath out. Murdoc had noticed the young man's comings and goings, and can't help but be curious about it all. But not wanting to reveal that to anyone, he'd sat quietly in the Winnie watching the younger man's progress through the night. Now it seemed to of settled down, and something was going to happen. Not wanting to be the last to know, the old man had been waiting for 2D to disappear into his room. Having finally done so, Murdoc takes the cue to move, and quickly darts into the back room for a look.

"A bath? Eh, wha, whatever floats yer boat D?" about to walk away, Murdoc stops, as a devious thought worms it's way through the evil bassist's mind. He slowly turns and looks back at the many computers and electrical equipment, that is stacked tightly around the room. Turning his head, he gazes at the warm steamy water in the bath tub, as a cruel smile curls its way up the corners of his mouth. Chuckling to himself, the bassist steps back inside, and quietly pulls the door behind him. A few seconds later, he reappears again, almost crashing into a returning 2D.

"Muds? Where did you come from?" 2D asks, stepping back and giving the bassist room to step around him. Murdoc stares blankly at him, then back at the room.

"Where did I....?" he squeaks in frustrated reply. "Football practice! Where do ya think? I ehhh, decided ta finally take that Beckham guy on. Course, heh, heh, you know who won right?" Murdoc sneers.

"Um.... David?" 2D answers blankly. He just makes it into the room, as Murdoc's fist connects with the closing door.

"I know where you live Dullard!" Murdoc shouts through the closed door as he slinks off to the Winnie. 2D listens to the heavy sound of Murdoc's Cuban heels, as they clomp their way through the car park, back towards the wagon, and breathes a sigh of relief. Glad that the old man wasn't angry enough to kick down the door and possibly drown him in the bath he'd installed, before the younger man had, had a chance to enjoy it. He walks over to his bath, and dips his fingers in the water, testing it's temperature. Murdoc sits staring out the Winnie's side window, smiling and occasionally chuckling to himself, expecting that at any moment, he'd hear enormous zapping and popping sounds echoing round the car park, from the back end. He licks his dry lips and imagines the sight of the young man, stepping through the back end door, blackened and smoking, with his blue spiked hair, standing even more on end than usual. He drops his chin to his chest chuckling at the thought, before looking back up to the door to continue his vigil. After a while, 2D steps completely unharmed from the room, and walks straight back to his bedroom, closing the door behind him. Murdoc sits back dumbfounded, blinking in shock at the back end door, before snapping his head around and staring towards 2D's bedroom. Snarling to himself about how unfair it all was, before finally deciding to get drunk instead. He stands up and stomps down towards the other end of the Winnie, throwing himself onto his bed and waving the whole thing off.

A few days later, Murdoc is alone in Kong. Wandering around the empty hallways, looking for something to do or break, he finds himself standing at the back end door. He's about to walk away, when he remembers he's alone. Sneaking a quick look about himself, he rushes back to the Winnie. Seconds later he's back at the back end door, holding a filthy towel in one arm, and a little, evil looking rubber duck, with large horns and a nasty expression on its beak.

"Just you and me Ducky. Ahaw, haw, haw." Murdoc snickers, then squeaks the duck. Completely forgetting he'd set up one of the computers to fall into the bath, if you moved around too much, Murdoc quickly undresses, and tosses the evil duck into the water. With a surprisingly playful grin, he smiles at the bobbing duck in the water, and takes position ready to leap in himself.

"GERONIMOOOO!" he shouts, and dives in. The bath water sloshes up one end of the bath, then back again, the momentum shifting the whole bath itself slightly across the floor, with a loud rasping sound. The computer slips and teeters for a moment, ready to fall, just as Murdoc lifts his head out of the water, and flicks his hair from his eyes. He stares at the computer for a few seconds and just at that moment, the memory returns and he lifts his arms from the water, leaning forwards in an attempt to stop it falling in.

"NOOOOOOOOO!" he screeches. Outside in the car park, there is a loud electrical popping sound, and smoke billows from under the back ends door.

Later that evening, 2D, Russel and Noodle, are sitting down to dinner. Talking about the days events, as they shovel food into their mouths, when Murdoc walks in. His hair, standing on end, and a filthy look of anger etched into his face. All three band members watch as the fuming bassist walks over to one of the cabinets, and retrieves a bottle of Rum, then almost snorting at them, continues on to the balcony, slamming the door behind him. 2D stands and is about to wander out to ask him what had happened, but Russel grips his arm tightly, and says he'd be better off not knowing, pulling the younger man back down into his chair.

Sitting on top of a large pile of rubbish, somewhere near the middle of the land fill, is a suspiciously burned looking bath tub. Apart from the evil duck, the only testament to a good idea, gone bad.


End file.
